The divine attribute associated with this third week of the Omer is Tiferet, which means Beauty or Harmony.
In the Kabbalistic mapping of these attributes or sefirot onto the human body, Tiferet – which is third in the Omer count, but sixth in the larger sum of ten – sits in the middle, at the heart center. There are three upper crown sefirot for the head and then the right and left arms of Hesed and Gevurah (love and strength), one on each side of the body, and then, underneath and centered between those two right and left poles is Tiferet, the harmonizer of the two extremes.
Both/And
So from the start, we get a sense of Tiferet as a both/and attribute, the place inside us where we can welcome and hold conflicting energies, both the overflowing unconditional love of Hesed as well as the stringent discipline of Gevurah. Consider the sages Hillel and Shammai. Their arguments were fierce, each side representing a different way of viewing the world, Hillel more aligned with love and Shammai, with discipline. And concerning them, the Talmud famously says – elu ve’elu divrei Elokim chayim. These and these are the words of the living God (Eruvin 13b). That’s what Tiferet is, an elu ve’elu capacity, a capacity to hold this and this, both Hillel and Shammai, two narratives, two viewpoints in our one wide open human heart.
Your Both/And Capacity
Pausing here to feel into that capacity in yourself. Maybe bringing to mind some polarizations present in your life, either within yourself or between you and others, such as the polarization between conservative and liberal, universal and particular, self and other, security and adventure, rest and work, tradition and innovation, solitude and social connection, inner work and outer work, and suffering and joy. We have a tendency to want a single way to be the right way, to say – oh, this is the answer, finally, I’ve found the one way. I’ll just stick to that. But in our bodies there is a right hand as well as a left hand, a right leg and ear and eye as well as a left one. Tiferet invites you not to be identified with either side, but to move back towards the center of your body, to your heart space, noticing each hand, the right and the left, and returning to center. And from that central place, opening to hold both sides, one in each hand, love and discipline, heaven and earth, growth and self acceptance, Shammai and Hillel, letting both be present and held inside your Tiferet center. Not rejecting or favoring either one, but including and opening space for them both to be here. Not needing to decide.
You are not either pole, but the middle ground between them from which you can watch the movement, like a tree firmly planted, feeling into your core, your trunk, even as the leaves above sway in the wind, first to one side and then to the other, allowing that movement, and staying in your seat, anchored by your roots. That is Tiferet.
It’s like when we shake the lulav and etrog, we shake first to one side and then to the other, and after each movement we return to center. To the left and back, to the right and back. We do this also when we stretch, leaning towards each side in turn and then returning to center, to your seat, to your anchor, bringing with you and including the knowledge of both sides as you return.
The Letters of Tiferet
The word Tiferet in Hebrew – תפארת – has 5 letters. On either end of the word is a taf [ת], the last letter of the Hebrew alphabet, a stretch all the way to that extreme endpoint, like an arm on each end of the word, right and left. And then in the middle of the word, the third letter, is an alef [א], the first letter of the alphabet, perhaps standing for ani, for me, my strong centered Self. From this alef place I reach out to either pole, first all the way to the taf on one end and then all the way to the taf on the other end. Feeling that movement in your body, you are the centered Alef Ani, reaching out to either side, to either taf, to include the polarities, while remaining grounded in your alef center. Tiferet helps us build flexibility. Securely rooted in our core, we feel safe enough to sway back and forth with ease and grace, like leaves swaying in the breeze.
Not Getting Stuck
Tiferet offers flexibility because we disidentify with either polarity and become the one in the middle that moves freely between them. Normally, we tend to get stuck on one side. We cling to happiness and refuse the inevitable descent to occasional sadness. We want only intimacy, without allowing for the natural movement to and fro in any relationship, together and apart, together and apart. The angels are said to move continually ratzo vashov, running away from God and then returning, back and forth, distant and then close again, an ebb and flow of intimacy, like death and rebirth, both part of the life cycle. Neither one is a problem as long as we can move freely between them. The problem arises when we get stuck in one place, stuck in an endless pit of depression or in a false clinging to perpetual happiness. Tiferet invites us to let it all come and go in our system, to inhabit this middle place that holds both sides and to allow a natural movement between the poles without collapsing on either end and becoming stuck and immobilized.
Windows
Trauma is when we do get stuck in one place, not able to move fluidly between states. It’s like we are standing in an apartment with many windows facing in different directions and we keep staring out only through the window that faces a brick wall. Meanwhile there is also a window that opens out to a playground with laughing children, but we are fixated on this one window with the brick wall (from Margaret F. Arms, “Our Hearts Are Breaking: Thoughts on Suffering and Sorrow,” Presence 27.4, p. 57). Maybe we aren’t even aware that any other windows exist. That’s trauma, a kind of frozenness, a myopia. It’s not that the brick wall isn’t there. There is indeed a brick wall. It’s just not the whole story. When we feel a totalizing despair, it’s very often this window problem. The darkness we see is true, but it’s only one part of the truth. Tiferet invites us to become flexible in what we see, moving from one window to another and not identifying or getting stuck in any one view, taking it all in as part of the whole, the suffering as well as the love and the hope.
Yaakov’s Ladder
Yaakov as the third of the patriarchs is associated with this attribute of Tiferet. His ladder dream epitomizes this Tiferet inclusivity and flexibility, as the angels flow smoothly back and forth between heaven and earth, an ebb and flow of relationship, nothing stopping the movement, no reaching for either pole. No need to hold on to the high of being in heaven or to sink into despair about the low of being on earth, just allowing the shift, like the breath in your body, in and out both important, no inhale without an exhale, no exhale without an inhale, not preferring one over the other; you are the vessel that holds them both as they move fluidly through you, both the reaching up toward heaven of the inhale and the coming down to earth of the exhale, both the excitement and growth of the inhale and the restfulness and emptying out of the exhale, both the sadness and grief of loss and the pride and joy of new birth. Letting the cycle wash through you.
Truth
We laugh and we cry, and both are true. Tiferet is also associated with Emet, with truth, because truth is not one sided. When we situate ourselves on only one side, we are biased; we have a narrow perspective; we can’t see properly. It’s like we are trying to walk on one leg. How can we walk on one leg? Truth encompasses both sides; truth is the ability to see it all, to have a God’s eye point of view, to have a wide open beating heart that hears the sorrows and joys of both sides and understands their deep interconnectedness, sees the whole picture, sees how the different sides are integrated into one picture of truth, like Hillel and Shammai, each holding a piece of the truth, a piece of the whole.
A Sacred Repair
Through Tiferet we move from fragmented shards to a whole view that puts the pieces back together. We – our bodies – are the vessels of that integration, that tikkun, that repair, that sacred pulling together of conflicting powers like estranged lovers, holding them both in our heart at once, the male and the female, the right and the left, lekha dodi lekrat kallah, come my beloved to greet your bride. It is a redemptive act that draws a divided creation and a divided divinity back into harmony through our own internal integration.
Beauty
And there is such beauty and joy in that integration! Tiferet is also translated as beauty, the kind of beauty that radiates divine glory. It is the beauty of wholeness, of integration, of harmony and symmetry, of bringing together contrasting colors to form a stunning picture. Nature is not lopsided, but full of symmetry and balance. Tiferet is a woven tapestry of contrasting energies and colors that meet inside us, reflecting the truth and diversity of who we are as divine beings. When we contain both love and discipline, both right and left, both light and dark – whatever the both/and you are needing right now – when we contain them both inside the same heart, something beautifully true and truly beautiful emerges.
Resting in that heart space that can hold it all, maybe you can feel the right and the left coming together inside without effort, like squabbling children coming home, and maybe, too, you can get a glimpse of the radiant garment being woven out of those disparate pieces in your one true Tiferet heart.
